Blog of Professional Speaker Snowden McFall

Dignity and Respect- For Yourself and Others

Helping Others Needs to Be a Two Way Street

Most of us have been raised thinking it’s appropriate to be generous, kind, loving and helpful to others. In in today’s world with so much suffering, we are increasingly asked to reach out and help. And if we can and are willing to do so, without strings attached, we should. Sharing the wealth of heart and wallet is a good thing.

But the key here is to do so while allowing the other person to have dignity. Every human being has a sense of pride and self-worth, and truly no one wants to beg for assistance if they can help it. When giving aid in any form, whether it’s advice, money, clothing or food, be sure to allow the recipient to have dignity.

Kevin Hall, in his wonderful book Aspire, explains it eloquently when he tells the story of Pravin and “genshai.” Genshai means never treating another person in a way that would make them feel small. So if you are giving money to a beggar, you don’t toss a coin to them, you get down to their level, look them in the eye and smile. Then you give them the money and say “bless you.” You are treating them with respect.

An interesting twist on this is to practice genshai with yourself. Never treat yourself in a way that would make you feel small. And most of us do this regularly. We criticize ourselves mercilessly, judging our actions and finding fault. All that does is lower our self-esteem and create guilt and resentment patterns against ourselves. If you feel you did something in a less than perfect way, forgive yourself and move on, this is the essence of resilient personal leadership. Be kind to yourself. Be kind to others.

___________________

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Recharge Your Brain with Down Time

“We need quiet time to examine our lives openly and honestly -spending quiet time alone gives your mind an opportunity to renew itself and create order.” Susan Taylor

Access Your Creativity Through Quiet Time

Most busy professionals have very little time for themselves. Deadlines, quotas, meetings, family, life obligations all take a toll on our personal time. Your brain never turns off. You probably have “cerebral congestion.” Creating intentional downtime to restore clarity, creativity, and energy is essential to leadership resilience under sustained pressure.

Recent study by LexisNexis of 1,700 white collar workers in the U.S., China, South Africa, the U.K. and Australia showed employees spend more than half their workdays receiving and managing data rather than using it to do their jobs; 50% confessed that they were reaching a breaking point.
Most of our best ideas come from quiet time. Many great concepts that later became life-improving products originated in the shower. Several companies encourage employees to take one day a week to work on whatever project they want- whether it’s part of their job description or not. Some of these companies’ best innovations resulted. But if there’s no time, no quiet space, no daydreaming, there’s very little room for innovation.

How Can You Get More Quiet Time?

• cut down on meetings and shorten them. Ask- could this be accomplished in an email or memo? Make a guideline that all meetings get done in 15 minutes or less. Tell people in advance to laser their thoughts.

• exercise nearly every day-and instead of watching TV, talking on the phone or reading emails while you’re doing it, just be quiet. Play soothing environmental music. Or get outside. Let your brain wander while you are in nature.

• sleep at least 7 hours a night. Sleep is critical to your overall health, well-being and memory. In true restful sleep, your brain synthesizes through various levels of consciousness and replenishes itself. The quiet of sleep is absolutely necessary for sanity, not to mention performance and achievement.

• meditate. Even if it is only for 10 minutes a day, taking the time to be quiet and go inside, listen, and breathe deeply can give the brain a vital rest.

• take your vacation time. In 2013, most Americans left 4 vacation days on the table. No laptops or emails or phone calls on vacation. Be truly off the grid and come back refreshed and revitalized.

• get outside in nature. The new field of ecopsychology demonstrates that spending time in nature relaxes the brain, restores the body and spirit.

Your brain has great wisdom and gifts to share with you. It can only do so when it truly has a chance to recharge. Give it that time.

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Turn Anger into Action Without Losing Your Clarity

Anger is a natural response to injustice, loss, or perceived threat. In moments of collective stress or personal frustration, anger often signals that something deeply matters. The challenge is not eliminating anger, but deciding what we do with it.

Unprocessed anger hardens into bitterness. Directed anger, however, can become fuel for meaningful action, leadership, and positive change.

Three Ways to Channel Anger Constructively

Take purposeful action. Energy that remains trapped becomes destructive. Energy that is directed becomes productive. Volunteer, support causes aligned with your values, mentor others, or advocate for change. Action restores a sense of agency and steadiness.
Be for something, not against everything. Leaders anchor themselves in what they stand for. Integrity, fairness, compassion, and responsibility are stabilizing forces. Constant opposition drains energy. Purpose-focused leadership builds it.
Train your attention toward what is working. There is always goodness unfolding alongside hardship. Seek stories of courage, cooperation, and kindness. What we repeatedly focus on shapes our emotional resilience and decision-making.

Leadership resilience is not about suppressing emotion. It is about regulating emotion so it informs action rather than overwhelms it. Anger, when guided by values and intention, can sharpen clarity rather than erode it.

To see how emotional steadiness fits into a broader framework for leading under pressure, explore the Leadership Resilience Hub.

Never underestimate the impact of thoughtful, committed action. Small, steady efforts—directed with purpose—are how real change happens.

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Want to Get Fired Up?

October is International Fired Up! Month

“Enthusiasm is the greatest asset you can possess, for it can take you further than money, power or influence.” Dada Vaswani

I created this month in 1997 to celebrate attitude and success. Your positive attitude determines your success in life, and we know from the research that optimists sell 56% more than pessimists, and are more effective leaders. Building enthusiasm, optimism, and shared purpose is a core theme of inspirational leadership speaking that energizes teams and communities to perform at their best.

You can Host a Fired Up! week at work or in your community. employees, students or association members can:

• maintain a daily success list of all you accomplish
• share inspirational music, movies, quotesl books or stories (movies like Dolphin Tale 1 and 2 or the Blind Side, The Butler, Mr. Holland’s Opus are all good starters)
• talk about their dreams and goals, successes, victories
• form Fired Up! Inspiration Circles where they support each other’s dreams
• track group individual successes on a Fired Up! bulletin board/ victory wall.
• participate in a community service event on Make a Difference Day, Oct 25, 2014!

Be sure this is a sincere and meaningful exercise and give special attention to it. Let your people know you value them and encourage their positive attitude. People who know they are valued as human beings are more loyal and productive.

“Enthusiasm spells the difference between mediocrity and accomplishment.” Norman Vincent Peale

Oct 25 Chamber All Council Community Involvement Project

If you live in the Jacksonville Fl area, participate with me in a park clean-up, painting and education project.

This morning project will include:
• painting the picnic shelter
• building benches
• painting the utility building and kids’ log cabin
• adding flowers to the playground
• converting the shuffleboard court into educational hopscotch areas with colorful paint and stencils.

Location is Home Gardens Park, 6367 Mockingbird Rd., Jacksonville. If you would like to join me, whether you are a chamber member or not, go here to sign up: http://www.signupgenius.com/go/60b0f4fa8ac2aa46-october

You can make a difference, too, and reap the rewards of volunteering. It’s an amazing stress reliever, You help others and you help yourself. It truly gets you Fired Up!

Have a great weekend and get Fired Up!

Snowden

If you enjoyed this newsletter, please share it with others. Sign up for tips on success, marketing, happiness and stress relief. You’ll get a free report on how to get and stay Fired Up! http://firedupnow.com/top20tips/

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Leaders and Sacrifice
Building Resilient Leadership

In his book Leaders Eat Last, Simon Sinek argues that true leaders are willing to sacrifice for their people. They protect those in their care. They put the needs of others ahead of personal comfort or recognition.

This idea is not sentimental. It is structural. Sustainable leadership depends on what a leader is willing to give up in order to create trust and stability under pressure.

Leadership sacrifice is not about working longer hours or taking on more tasks. It is about letting go of behaviors that undermine resilience, clarity, and long-term performance.

What Leaders Must Be Willing to Sacrifice

Micromanagement

When leaders cling to control, they limit ownership and suppress initiative. Sacrificing micromanagement builds trust, increases engagement, and strengthens team resilience under pressure.

Ego

Leadership is not a stage for personal validation. When leaders sacrifice ego and connect authentically, communication improves and psychological safety rises.

Image Protection

Backing your team during conflict sometimes requires sacrificing personal optics. Protecting people instead of appearances builds loyalty and long-term performance.

Short-Term Approval

Choosing long-term capability over short-term applause is another essential sacrifice. Investing in development may not yield immediate results, but it strengthens sustainability and reduces burnout.

Sacrifice and Leadership Resilience

Resilient leadership requires intentional decisions under pressure. Letting go of control, ego, and short-term thinking creates an environment where people can think clearly, act responsibly, and remain engaged.

When leaders sacrifice wisely, they protect both performance and wellbeing.

Learn more about building sustainable leadership through the Leadership Resilience System and practical burnout prevention strategies.

Leadership is not about what you gain. It is about what you are willing to give up for the good of those you lead.

How Leaders Fail

“Leadership is lifting a person’s vision to higher sights, the raising of a person’s performance to a higher standard, the building of a personality beyond its normal limitations.” Peter F. Drucker

The Biggest Mistakes Leaders Make

• Breaking agreements and not keeping promises
Other people assume a promise from a leader will be kept. And when you fail to follow-through on any level, it breaks trust. It creates dis-ease and mistrust on all levels and calls into question your credibility. Don’t make commitments you can’t keep. Renegotiate them, delegate them, but do not break promises. Breaking trust, losing emotional control, or failing to communicate transparently are common leadership breakdowns that underscore why leadership resilience is essential for sustaining credibility and performance under pressure.

• Emotional outbursts. I had a boss who screamed at everyone, for no reason. I’ve seen other leaders do this, and all it does is alienate others around you. The secret to successful leadership is sustaining performance under pressure, no matter what. DO NOT VENT on your staff. They deserve better. Go to therapy, work out, get the anger out before you come to work.

• Lack of empathy: Not understanding how your people feel after a work crisis, not giving them comp time when they have worked overtime for many days, not being compassionate when your people have a family emergency. You must demonstrate compassion. Your staff are first and foremost people; treat them with respect and caring.

• Not Giving Appreciation or Praise
70% of American workers are actively disengaged. 88% of American workers NEVER receive thanks for the work they have done! There’s a correlation. Praise people specifically in writing for a job well done. Say thank you publicly to others for their work. Express your thanks often.

• Not Being Transparent
More than ever, leaders need to tell the truth and address fear and rumors. Even if you can’t tell the whole story, acknowledge that yes, change is happening, and you are doing everything in your power to resolve issues quickly. Update your people often. Acknowledge their worries and be honest in responses. Maintain an optimistic approach and keep them updated every step of the way.

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Why Sitting is So Bad for You

Many people are now sitting more than 9 hours a day- eek…! Our bodies were crafted for us to be upright, All this sitting is highly dangerous.

According to a new study published in the Archives of Internal Medicine, sitting for long periods increases your risk of all-cause early death.

In fact, it has been shown to increase risk for heart disease, obesity, diabetes, dementia, and some cancers.

• Sitting 6+ hours a day makes you 40% likelier to die within 15 years

• Obese people sit more than 2.5 hours a day than non-on=bese,

• Sitting results in a drop in insulin effectiveness.

• Being sedentary (sitting) for long periods of time without moving increases inflammation (a leading cause of disease.)

The solutions :

• get a standing desk or treadmill desk like the one shown above, available at Target®

* get up once an hour and walk for 5 minutes. Use this time to get water, chat with others, go outside or look outside in nature. stretch, move.

• make it a habit to walk while you are on the phone. Most phones are cordless anyway.

The most important thing is to get moving…often.

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Feeling Overwhelmed?
Discipline and Letting Go

http://www.dreamstime.com/stock-images-business-woman-cubicle-overworked-stressed-image5934154

Why Discipline and Letting Go Must Work Together

Guest contribution by stress reduction expert Melissa Heisler.

You are not alone. Many professionals are experiencing sustained overload. Opportunities increase. Deadlines accelerate. Responsibilities expand. The pace can feel relentless.

When overwhelm rises, two seemingly opposite strategies become essential: discipline and letting go.

The Power of Discipline

When circumstances feel chaotic, structure restores clarity.

This is the time for routines, checklists, scheduling, and focused execution. It is the time to reduce distractions and recommit to what truly matters. Discipline creates stability when external conditions feel unstable.

Strong daily systems prevent reactive decision-making and reduce cognitive fatigue.

The Power of Letting Go

Discipline alone is not enough. Overwhelm often intensifies because of internal pressure.

Let go of the belief that you must do everything alone. Let go of emotional overinvestment in outcomes. Let go of the idea that rest must wait until everything is finished.

Letting go reduces unnecessary stress and restores perspective.

Self-Care Is Not Optional

When workloads increase, self-care is often the first sacrifice. Skipping meals, reducing sleep, abandoning exercise, and neglecting quiet time may create temporary productivity. But it is not sustainable.

Physical health supports cognitive clarity. Mental clarity improves decision quality. Sustainable leadership depends on both.

If overwhelm is becoming chronic, explore practical ways to prevent burnout before it escalates. You may also benefit from strengthening your daily systems through the Leadership Resilience System and practical stress management strategies.

When you feel overwhelmed, restore discipline. Clarify your true priorities. Protect your self-care practices. Then let go of everything beyond your control.

You can only accomplish so much. Trust that what truly matters will be completed in its time.

And do not forget to breathe.

No More Excuses

Not long ago, I met a gentleman who was downtrodden and beleaguered. He explained to me all the reasons his business was not doing well and declared that he was just no good at that Internet stuff. The stress was impacting his company and his ability to lead. He also went on to say he had avoided a certain market because he was afraid what they might do. He had all the perfect excuses for why he couldn’t succeed. I felt sorry for him and had compassion for him. But ultimately, he made his own choices and he is now sitting in his discontent.

Excuses– we all make them and we all have them. And ultimately, they mean nothing. NOTHING. They are just rationalizations as to why we think we can’t do something.

In this man’s case, he could have taken courses to learn the Internet, hired a college kid to do it for him, or used his own kids. There are so many different ways he could overcome his fear of the Internet but instead, he just gave up.

Don’t give up. And NO MORE EXCUSES!

You can overcome almost any challenge. Ask for help. Take courses. Check and see if your assumptions are true. Network with others in your field and learn how they handle these issues. Just don’t sit around whining. Take action to overcome these challenges.

I once heard Christopher Reeves speak after his debilitating accident. He talked about control and how he had lost so much of it when he became paralyzed. But then he realized the one area he could take control was how he treated his caregivers.

If someone like that can take control, take action and move forward, you can, too.

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Never Be Late Again

Are you one of those people who is chronically late? Who always rushes from place to place and leaves people waiting on you, creating tension before you even start? Do you realize that being late is actually a broken agreement, that it says to the person you are meeting “You are not important enough to me to be on time.” It’s unfair, insulting and unprofessional, and that’s so not like you.

How to Be on Time

• Choose and prioritize. Make the decision to be early instead of late. Set your clock 15 minutes ahead, set your phone alarm to beep you 15 minutes before you have to leave and then 5 minutes so that you make it on time. Use whatever little tricks you have to get out the door in plenty of time.

• Plan on delays, in traffic, in elevators, in subways, etc. Life is like that, so build in a time cushion. I have a meeting this morning that takes me 1/2 hour to get to- without traffic glitches. So I will leave at 45 minutes before to give myself a 15 minute cushion. If you’re early, stay in your car and get things done before you go in. Showing up 5 minutes early is fine, 15 is probably too much.

• Call when you are running behind. Demonstrate respect for the person you are meeting. Give them an accurate assessment of when you will arrive.

• Prep for meetings and events the night before. Have everything you need all set to go. That saves scrambling around at the last minute.

• Have one place in your house for keys, cellphones, etc. Leave your keys there. This prevents last minute rushing and looking for lost items.

Once you make the commitment to be on time, you will find the quality of your relationships improves and you will feel better about yourself, instead of guilt and ashamed. You’re capable and competent, you know how to handle this. Just do it and reap the rewards.

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