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Toxic People Destroy Your Work Environment

Screaming man who is very stressed outThe Dangers of Toxic People

In his book, Social Intelligence, Daniel Goleman writes about recent brain research which is quite compelling. “One person’s inner state affects and drives the other person…. We actually catch each other’s emotions like a cold.” The more significant the relationship, the greater the impact on the other person. This is why toxic relationships with people who yell or demean us truly make us ill, and why loving, nurturing people make us feel better.

Being with a highly positive person or a joyful young child is an immune system booster. Upbeat, caring co-workers who listen and encourage others are gold in the office. They make all the difference on stressful days.

The implications of this research on the workplace are staggering. You can no longer afford to let that bad apple with the lousy attitude stay on board. He or she is literally poisoning your business. Angry, hostile managers actually demotivate their employees. Social intelligence means giving undivided, caring attention to others, demonstrating interest and empathy. This is what builds relationships and what generates employee enthusiasm and loyalty.

Give careful attention to the relationships your people are building and the corporate culture you are promoting. Keep Fired Up! people around who inspire and encourage ithers and your organization will ignite with growth and goodwill.

 ©2011 Snowden McFall All Rights Reserved. No duplication

Update Your Marketing: Be Local, Social & Mobile

Last week, I had the privilege of attending three different seminars, one on social, local, mobile media from the Florida Times Union, one on corporate wellness from Welcoa’s David Hunnicutt, and one on the huge changes at Google on line. This all happened in the space of 48 hours, so you can imagine how stimulated and Fired Up! I was from all the new ideas. Throughout this month, I’ll distill key points for you and share what I’ve learned. Marketing that works today is less about pushing messages and more about understanding how people actually communicate, decide, and engage in real time.

As Mike Blinder shared, a huge amount of people use smart phones for news, navigation, education and business information. Mobile advertising is rising faster than any other form, with 74% of buyers making purchases because of research they did on the Internet. Think about it- what have you used your smartphone for besides a call? Directions? Booking a flight, buying something on ebay? Many people are turning to a mobile optimized website. Doctors and dentists use them to remind patients of upcoming visits via text, restaurants and stores text specials and coupons and link you to their site. Since people spend 2.7 hours a day on their media device, 82% see mobile ads. Something to think about for your future marketing efforts.

 ©2011 Snowden McFall All Rights Reserved. No duplication

Resolving Conflict with Non-Violent Communication

Non-Violent Communication as a way to reduce stressOne of the most profound and powerful books I have ever read is Non-Violent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. Written by a man who has negotiated between Palestinians and Israelis, gang war members, business associates and married couples, this book holds the key to getting what you want out of good relationships.

Seemingly simple, his concept has 4 major components for any meaningful conversations.

1. Observe what the other person is doing or saying without judgment or blame ex: “I heard you had a loud discussion with that customer. Sounded like everyone was upset.”

2. State how we feel when we observe this action: “I get nervous when I hear difficult customer conversations because I am worried about us losing the business. Maintaining good relationships is very important to our work.”

3. State your needs. “We need to keep every customer happy and add new business. Satisfied customers refer other customers.That’s how we keep this company going. “

4. Make a request: “I’d like to help you deal with those difficult customers.  Next time an upset customer calls, would you be willing to simply listen,  let them know you understand and will get back to them and not lose your temper?  Then you can come discuss the issue with me and we’ll resolve it.”

The technique requires honesty, thoughtfulness and empathy, but it has very powerful results.  When I first started using the technique with my husband, we were amazed. Both of us used the tools, and  felt deeply honored and cared about. It has deepened an already rich relationship and I have seen the same thing with my clients.

Read the book and put it into practice- and let me know your great results.

@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

 

 

 

Celebrating Small Successes for Stress Relief & Happiness

At the end of each day, record 10 small successes you’ve had that day. Anything you intended to do and did is a success. Catch yourself in the act of doing things right and see how much
happier and more fulfilled you are.

My birthday is in July and it was a joy to celebrate twice, once with women friends at lunch and then at a party my husband threw for me.  Celebrating life’s little moments of success and joy is so important to our stress levels, happiness and overall performance at work.  It’s rare that the huge successes happen; what matters is to acknowledge all the small achievements you have every day.

Cheering women
I love this quote from Norman Lear:

“Success is how you collect your minutes.
You spend millions of minutes to reach one triumph,
one moment,
then you spend maybe a thousand minutes
enjoying it.
If you are unhappy through those millions of minutes,
what good are the thousands of minutes of triumph?
It doesn’t equate.
Life is made up of small pleasures,
Happiness is made up of those tiny successes.
The big ones come too infrequently.
If you don’t have  all those
zillions of tiny successes,
the big ones don’t mean anything.”
Norman Lear
Here’s a tip: at the end of each day, record 10 small successes you’ve had that day. Anything you intended to do and did is a success.  Catch yourself in the act of doing things right and see how much
happier and more fulfilled you are.

Cut Your Stress by Eliminating Clutter

Are you aware that every pile of clutter in your office or home is sapping your energy?  Every book you have not finished reading, every article you not have finished, every corner of clutter registers inside as an incomplete.

These incompletions drain you and your energy, which could be better used on highMan overwhelmed by clutter- he needs Stress Express results tasks.

There are several books on the market which are excellent resilience resources for leaders.  Julie Morgenstern and I shared the platform in  NY, and her bestselling book Organizing From the Inside Out is a great place to start.

For the future, create file folders every time you pull an article, label it and file it away in a reference file cabinet.

Go through your mail just once and create a reading file.  Take that file with you on airplanes and throw out what you don’t want.

Give clothes you haven’t worn in a year to Good Will or Dress for Success.  We have a garage section at the recycling center where we can take good items we no longer have a need for. I’ve donated old rugs, chairs, lamps, etc. and within 5 minutes, someone else has taken it for themselves.

Free up the space around you and you will find your mind is freer to handle all your important business matters.

@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

Do You Know What Your Clients Think of You?

It’s very important to stay in touch with your customers in some way, to learn what their Girl chatting on phgone, Fired Up!needs are, how you can improve, and to show you value them. It’s key to growing your business.

There are several ways to find out what your customers think.  One is a customer satisfaction survey, which can be done via phone, email, or mail, with free instruments like surveymonkey.com.  One of our services is to call their customers and interview them. These calls often yield great testimonial information, and many times, the customers tell us they want to do more business with our client.  Often they will describe some minor flaw or mistake, which then gets passed on to the client so they can fix it – fast. It is much less expensive to get more business from an existing customer than go get new ones.

Find out what your customers think and then take action accordingly.  It just may get you some new business.

@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Fraud Syndrome- Does it Plague You?

One of the interesting things about success is that many people don’t feel they are worthy of it. In fact, they judge themselves harshly for past mistakes and use that as a reason to feel like a fraud when they achieve key goals or levels of success. Sometimes they end up sabotaging themselves and limiting their growth, all subconsciously.  One of the keys to overcoming the fraud syndrome is authenticity.

 

Be Authentically Yourself

Watching the tv show “The Glee Project, what struck me most was how the producer and casting agent wanted these talented young people to be just BE THEMSELVES.  All too often, people feel they have to fit into some mold to succeed.  We think we have to achieve a certain degree, look a particular way, dress in special clothes to be accepted and loved.

And the truth is the opposite. When you are truly yourself, you are your most loveable and approachable.  As people age, they tend to relax more and more, caring less about what others think of them.  That is incredibly liberating.  As Emerson wrote, “To thine own self, be true.” Live life according to your values and principles, be the wonderful, unique and gifted person that you are and share the best of yourself with others.  The world will be a poorer place if you don’t.

 

@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

Take Responsibility for Your Energy

Like many people, I recorded the finale of the Oprah Winfrey show. Rather than have guests, she gave us a keynote speech filled with incredible wisdom.  I’ve shared some of those nuggets below with suggestions for how you can implement them at work.  One of my favorites is “Luck is when opportunity meets preparation.” How can you prepare for that window of opportunity in your life?
Oprah has inspired millions for decades, and yet managed to make each one of us feel like we mattered to her.  Quite a feat, quite a remarkable woman
 

What Energy are You Sending Out?

Oprah’s also shared about brain specialist Jill Taylor, the author of My Stroke of Insight.  This compelling book chronicles her journey from massive stroke to full recovery. 
I read it recently when my father had a stroke and it gave me great insight.  Jill said “Please take responsibility for the energy you bring into my space.” Doctors who treated her as though she wasn’t there discouraged her; those who looked her in the eye and encouraged her made a world of difference.
So the question is, what kind of energy do you bring into the space of others?  It is upbeat, confident, compassionate, or is it critical, impatient, demanding?  Think about how you can make a difference in the energy you carry.  Also consider what energy comes into your life from others; you may want to limit your exposure to negative people who complain and disparage others.
 
@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

 

Burnout Prevention Tip: Just Say No

One of the most effective burnout prevention strategies is also one of the hardest skills to practice: saying no.

Many people who appear calm, effective, and resilient are not managing more than everyone else. They are managing their boundaries better.

Why Saying No Protects Your Energy

Say No

If you have a demanding professional life and want to sustain performance without sacrificing your health or family life, limits matter. Evenings filled with constant commitments quickly erode recovery time. More than two nights a week of work or community obligations often begins to tax both energy and relationships.

When pressure is already high, adding new responsibilities compounds exhaustion. Saying no is not avoidance. It is discernment.

How to Say No Without Burning Bridges

An especially effective way to decline additional leadership or board work is to be clear and respectful:

“I only want to give you 100% effort, and right now I can’t do that with all my current commitments. Please ask me again next year so I can re-evaluate.”

Most people appreciate honesty. They would rather have you at your best than overextended and disengaged.

Learning when and how to say no is one of the most reliable ways to prevent burnout before it takes hold. Explore additional strategies leaders use to protect energy and performance at Prevent Burnout.

Sustainable leadership requires limits. Protect yours intentionally.

@2011 Snowden McFall.  All Rights Reserved. No duplication without permission

Take Excellent Care of Your Customers

Shaking handsOne of the most important dimensions of any marketing plan should be customer retention. The best way to keep your business healthy is to take excellent care of your employees and existing customers.

Even if the primary work you have done for them has been completed, check in regularly- at least once every 4-6 weeks.  Educate your customers, send them articles, post information on your website, send out ezines. Have lunch when you can.  Send them greeting cards.

A personal touch means so much.

Let them know you value you them. Always thank them for referrals- write handwritten notes and let them know how much you appreciate their business.

Never, ever, take them for granted.

 

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