Stress Tip: Ask for What You Want
At Work, At Home, Make Your Needs Clear
So many times, we get upset because someone did not do what we wanted, how we wanted it, and we did not get our needs met. The easiest way to overcome this is to be crystal clear about what you want and ask for it. Most people are grateful to have clarity and to know how to help and support you. They want to participate in your life but may not know how.
I have found at home that my wonderful husband cannot read my mind. So I ask, “The garbage is really smelly, could you please take it out now?” He responds very well to requests, rather than complaints. Most of us are like that.
When you are swamped at work, at the end of your rope and so stressed you are snapping at others, ask for help. Try a request like: “This week is going to be difficult for me because I am overwhelmed with the new regulations. Could you please help me by following up on the ___ project? I don’t want to slow down our progress. Thanks so much for your assistance with this.” Others will be happy to help when you clue them in.
Key Takeaways
- Unmet needs usually come from unclear requests, not from other people’s unwillingness to help.
- Specific requests get better results than complaints, at home and at work.
- People generally want to help. They just need to know exactly what would be useful.
Clear, direct requests are one of the simplest communication habits that reduce stress for everyone involved. For more on communicating with clarity under pressure, visit Communication and Executive Presence.
©2012, 2026 Snowden McFall All Rights Reserved. No duplication or reprinting without permission and author reference.